I’m behind on blogging… it’s funny how that happens when you have an insta-toddler and have to re-remember how to parents one of these lovely creatures. But she is currently napping and I have a moment to catch up, so here we go…

Tuesday morning, we met our guide in the lobby at 8:30 to go to the registration office where you become legal guardians of your child. We met the notary in the same room where we had Family Day the day before. The notary checked all of our paperwork, and then said a few words, basically thanking us for adopting these children, wishing us well and encouraging us to take good care of them. Then he said “you are now legally their parents”. To say that was lovely to hear is an understatement. We feel so lucky to be Jia’s parents and now it’s now it’s official not only in our hearts, but on paper too.

Funny side story: most families who adopt their children in Zhengzhou take a picture in front of this red wall with Chinese writing on it, and we were no exception in wanting our pictures there. It seemed kind of momentous and I’d been waiting for a long time to get to stand there. So all the families in our travel group took their photos and we all felt very pleased with ourselves…. Then our guide said “do you know what that says?”. We all said no, of course, and she said “it says ‘Marriage Bureau…. So any Chinese person will wonder why you got married when you were adopting your child'”. We all found that highly amusing. It doesn’t change the symbolism for me, but it will make me laugh every time I see it.

From there, we went to notary office, which was 6 steep flights up an old government building. We sat around in a conference room for a while (we snagged the seats right in front of the AC… so nice!) and then we went to another room and had our picture taken. Then back down the stairs and back to the hotel. We spent the rest of the day just hanging out, going for walks, playing in the playroom, and chilling. Josh went to Wal-Mart and got stuck in a torrential downpour on the way back.

Wednesday was the day that we went to apply for Jia’s passport. For most families, you have to go to your child’s home city to apply, and in Jia’s case, her home city, Nanyang, was 3.5 hours away by van. As I mentioned to some of you on Facebook, they don’t really do car seats here, and kid are pretty much free to climb around their vehicles at will, I guess? I don’t really know. But I had chosen not to bring a car seat because there isn’t a reliable way to install them safely, so we were pretty much winging it. In the end, the less that is said about that day, the better. It was HARD. Jia didn’t like sitting in a lap/being held the whole time, there were major tantrums, and lots of tears, the latter both hers and mine. But in the end, we survived it, and sometimes that’s all you can say. I also think that it helped us get over the hump of Jia’s intense temper tantrums because when you have 85904904367340 of them in a day and your parents don’t give in on the big issues, that usually means they’re serious. So it seems like her tantrums since then have been shorter and less severe, which is nice. I feel like we fought the battles that will eventually win the war, so to speak.

At the beginning of our trip when spirits were still high and hopes plentiful…

Two of my favorite goofballs…

Also, yesterday I successfully used a squatty potty. I will let you look up with a squatty potty is on your own because I DID NOT take a picture.  I do have some boundaries. I debated about talking about it, but it is a source of great pride for me and I feel like I’ve accomplished some international travel bucket list item, so whatever, man. My thanks to my friend Gretchen for her tutorial on squatty potty usage.

Today we have a free day, which we desperately needed, so we had a leisurely morning, went to Wal-Mart and to lunch and now we’re chilling in the room. I see swimming and playroom in our futures.

Jia LOOOOOOVES seaweed snacks. She is welcome to them all.

As far as how we’re doing over all, I think that we’ve all had our moments where we’re so glad to be here, and some where we can’t wait to go home. I miss fresh fruits and veggies and water out of the tap. I miss idly eavesdropping on people at the next table over. I miss my house because living in a hotel gets old after a while. I really miss Eden and my friends and my family, although that’s been made easier by Facebook and WeChat, and we’ve gotten to talk to Eden every day, sometimes twice. I think I am just ready to go home and start my life again, just life + Jia. We have one more day in Zhengzhou and then we fly to Guangzhou on Saturday, to start our last leg of the trip there. We’ll be there for 6.5 days and then we head HOME. We are SO, SO ready. I can’t wait to eat a salad.

Spicy beef fried rice… yum!!

China kids meal: chicken wings, fried prawns, stir fried greens, corn, ramen and Fanta.

But on the other hand, we, and especially Jia, are leaving a lot behind too, and I think it’s really important that we don’t forget that. We have all gained so much in the process, but she is losing a tremendous amount too, and leaving her home country will be bittersweet.

Wearing her shirt from Eden…

I said “Jia, are you ready to go to America?” and she said “Let’s go!”

Keep the comments and posts coming, we have been so encouraged by them and it helps the homesickness. Thanks as always for following along on this crazy trip. Love you guys!

So far I’ve typed a blog from a plane, now it’s time for a blog from a train. We are currently on the bullet train from Beijing to Zhengzhou, cruising along at something like 180 mph. The China country side is flying by my window and it’s so nice to see green after being in the city.

Josh and our friends climbed all the way up to the first tower. Two of our friends climbed even beyond that. It was about 98 degrees and 99% humidity and they were sweaty messes.

This is a beacon tower. If you’ve ever watched Mulan, you know that these were used to send messages and the people who manned these towers would light them to let the next tower know that someone was coming so they could be prepared. To spread a message along the whole Wall took 3-4 hours.

Yesterday we went to the Great Wall and the jade factory. The Great Wall is AMAZING. To think it was built by hand is incredible. We went to a section of the wall called the Juyongguan Pass, which they said was less crowded then some of the other sections. I simply can’t imagine it having been more crowded then it was, so I am glad we went there. You pull into the parking lot and just see this massive crush of humanity headed up to the tower at the top of the hill. I was thinking that I wanted to climb up, so I headed that way with the other people from my group who were going, and we headed up. There are a series of steps and landings before you get to the actual climbing part of the Wall, and just getting up there was tough, so we took a short break at the beginning and then headed up. I got about a 16th of the way, turned around and looked at how steep it was going to be coming down and I couldn’t do it. Going up would be fine, but coming down would be petrifying. Not to mention that there were thousands of people climbing at the same time and if you get bumped once, you become a human bowling ball with thousands of pins. Nope, nope, nope. So Josh, and 5 other people from our travel group pressed on and I waited at the bottom with my friend Teresa. I got to see pictures and that was enough for me. Josh got to the top and went to the top of the tower, accessed by a ladder like stairway, and was only up there with 7 other people, so was able to have the whole place sort of to himself, which was cool. He also said that as he was coming down, he didn’t look out too much, just stayed focused on the steps in front of him, but that there were people who came down at the same time who were running down the middle like it was no big deal, some of them with babies or toddlers on their backs. I can’t imagine. When we were waiting we saw one girl boost herself into one of the lookout spaces for a picture, like it wasn’t thousands and thousands of feet down if she fell. People are CRAZY, here and everywhere.

After that, we went to the jade factory, which has an attached restaurant, and our guide ordered for us, so we got a ton of different dishes, which were all wonderful. It was nice to not have to think so much about what to eat and to let someone else do it for us. Then we went to the jade factory and did some shopping, but I can’t talk too much about it since it’s all gifts. It was a great experience and I’m glad we got to go.

Then we headed back to the hotel and rested for a while, and eventually ventured out for dinner. Some friends from our group had found a place the night before that they loved, so we went there, and it was so, so good. We were the only white people there, always a good sign in my book.

When we got back to the hotel, we were told that the President of CCAI, Joshua Zhong, was in Beijing and was coming to the hotel to meet with us just to see how our trip was going. So we got to meet Josh and thank him in person for the amazing things CCAI does, which was awesome. I cannot say enough good things about CCAI. They are the best, and I can’t imagine having done this without them and their help.

Then we went back and went to sleep. Sleep still isn’t coming super easy right now, so we are TIRED. We’ve been in bed by 8 most nights, and up by around 4, if not earlier. This morning, we got up on purpose at 4 to meet in the lobby by 5:30 to take the train to Zhengzhou.

So, about the train. We’d been told that the actual train was awesome, but getting to and through the station was stressful. Thankfully, we had a bus to take us to the station, and our guide took us through as far as she was able. I absolutely cannot imagine doing something like that for the first time ever with no one to help us. It would have been a nightmare. But she prepped us well and we knew exactly where to go and what to do, so it was chaotic, but manageable for sure. And now that we’re on the train, it’s AMAZING. Leg room, scenery, good company. We’re good. We’ll see what I say once we have to get off and find our way out.

These are all the people waiting to get on the train. We were in the midst of the chaos waiting our turn to go through. It was pretty intense, but more orderly then you’d expect.

Here is what the train looks like. It’s no Hogwarts Express, but it’ll do. 🙂

Tomorrow is the BIG DAY, JIA DAY!!! We will leave to meet her at 9:30 Monday morning in China, so 9:30 Sunday night in the US.  We would really appreciate your prayers for us (your) tonight.  She will likely be confused and scared and sad that we’re not her foster family, and that’s all okay.  We just want this to be as easy a transition as possible for her and for her to feel safe with us.  You can also be praying for all of the other families in our group, three of whom are first time parents.  We are ecstatic, nervous, excited, and a million other emotions. But mostly we’re just ready. Let’s get this beautiful girl with us and then HOME. It’s almost go time! My next update will likely be our Family Day post and I can’t wait to share it with you!

Hi there! It is currently Saturday morning, July 11th here, so I think Friday night you time? I don’t know, I’ve lost it all. :).

Yesterday, we went to Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City. And when I say we, I mean my travel group and most of the rest of China. It was CROWDED. We started in the Square and noticed there was a huge line of Chinese (no foreigners) queuing up through barricades for miles. Our guide told us that was people who were waiting to see Chairman Mao’s preserved body and that people essentially come and pilgrimage here. July is the one month that Chinese kids are out of schools, so many families come from all over China to Beijing to see the sites and see his body. There aren’t any building you can go into or anything, so it’s pretty much just looking at the buildings and walking through the square. That in itself is pretty neat though.

Tiananmen Square

Then we went through to the Forbidden City. I hate to point you to Wikipedia, but it does a far better job of explaining about the different rooms and what they were used for then I can ever do. So check this out: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forbidden_City. I didn’t realize how big it was, and how many little buildings there were. So many of them were used very infrequently, maybe only once, and the amount of time and the number of resources used to make each building is a mind blower.

Forbidden City

I would liken visiting the Tiananmen Square and the Forbidden City to visiting the monuments in Washington DC, especially if you’re a foreigner and haven’t had the benefit of learning all the history of what they mean. It was an amazing experience, and I’m glad we did it, but it was a lot to take in all at once.

After that, we went to find rickshaws, and took a rickshaw tour of Old Beijing. The streets are NARROW and shared by rickshaws, cars, motor bikes and regular bikes, and it’s a miracle anyone survives the traffic, but they do! It was amazing to see and so interesting. I’ll try to upload a video of it so you can get an idea. We also had lunch at the house of a local family and it was delicious! Meatballs, rice, spicy peppers, zucchini, peanuts, and a lot more… so yummy. That was the highlight of the day for me.

Most of our travel group.

So once we left Old Beijing, we went back to the hotel and rested for a little while, and then we has planned to meet up with our group to walk to dinner, but first, Snack Street. Our guide has told us that we should go, but warned us over and over, do not eat anything. You will get sick, sick, sick. So Snack Street is a row, maybe a quarter mile long, of food stalls, and they sell some bizarre stuff. I mean, bugs, spiders, snakes, testicles, you name it. I was walking past one stall and the guys inside said “I have some delicious lambs balls…” and then holds up another stick “…. Or perhaps you want lambs penis instead?”. I’m sure you’re shocked to learn that I turned him down. Our group made it through with no snack eaten on Snack Street, in large part because of the smell. I don’t know if it was a specific type of food or a mix of the food and sewer system, but there were parts of the street that smelled atrocious. So while Snack Street was fascinating and I am so glad we went, it took a long time before my appetite came back.

Scorpions, anyone?

I think these are crabs, but other people thought they looked like brains. Yummy!

I don’t know what the heck these are?

Tarantulas…. it’s what’s for dinner.

One other thing I want to talk about is culture shock. There are a few things specifically that have been interesting for me. First, especially because there are so many visitors to Beijing right now, we get stared at A LOT because non-Asians are very rare here. The kids are especially funny because they just don’t know what to make of us, and you can see their little brains just putting it all together and figuring out what’s what.

Secondly, there are TONS of people and very different understandings of personal space. People think absolutely nothing of bumping into you, pushing you out of the way, there are very few orderly lines, and paying for things is basically just whoever shoves money to the front first. This has been really challenging for me, because I am a person who deeply loves order and rules and there just aren’t the ones I’m used to here. And I have a lot of anxiety in large crowds, which is basically all China is. In the US, I can do crowds because I know the rules, and usually can then go home, to my comfy house and familiar food and there just isn’t that option here. So I’ve been having a hard time with figuring out of to decompress from the intensity.

One other thing I didn’t account for is how much not speaking or understanding the language would bother me. I am a word person and I love communicating with people, and not being able to is really throwing me off. I can’t do the polite midwestern “hi how are you beautiful weather” small talk and I never realized how much I liked it until I couldn’t do it.

So, those are a few of the hard things interspersed with a lot of really amazing things. One amazing thing is our travel group and how awesome they all are. We have 5 families, adopting 5 kids, 2 boys, 3 girls, ranging in age from 2-4. One family on their third adoption to make 5 kids at home, us, first adoption, second kid, and the other three, first adoption, first kid. We’ve all meshed really well and they are just lovely people. I’m incredibly thankful for that.

And on that note, I need to go shower to get ready to tackle the Great Wall of China. Then we’re going to do lunch and the jade factory, so let the buying begin. Miss you guys lots already!

There has been a lot of “stuff” going on around here lately, and I’m just now getting a minute to take a breath and get it all straight in my head.  Adoption is a lot of hurry up and wait, and we’ve finally hit the HURRY part.

First up, we had a exciting step forward when we received our LOA, which stands for Letter of Acceptance.  This is a government document that states that we agree to accept Jia as our daughter.  This is the final step you go through before your files are officially matched together and the deal is sealed, so to speak.  In our hearts, Jia has been our daughter for months now, but now it’s one step closer to being official in the eyes of the government, so hooray!  We received our “soft” LOA on May 7^th, which means that our agency was notified that we were approved and the CCCWA (government agency over adoption) was shipping our LOA.  Our agency received it on May 11^th, and sent it to us, and we received it on a few days later.  Then we signed it and sent it back.

Once that process is initiated, we get to apply to US Customs and Immigration using form I800, Petition to Classify Convention Adoptee as an Immediate Relative.  So that means that once that’s approved, Jia will be considered our daughter and a part of our family, just like Eden is.

Once our I800 is approved, it is sent to the National Visa Center, then it will be sent electronically to US Consulate in China, and they will produce an Article 5 letter, which will be delivered to the CCCWA by our agency reps in China.  That letter lets the CCCWA know that our immigration file is ready so they’ll issue our Invitation to Travel (TA or Travel Approval).  After that, we set a Consulate Date, which is when we meet with the US Consulate and complete our in China paperwork.  Once that’s set, we can make travel arrangements.   Most families travel within 10-21 days after TA.

So, it seems like all the stuff should take a while, right?  Not really!  Most families travel 9-12 weeks after LOA, which puts us travelling in July.  Now, there is still a LOT that could happen between now and then that could change that time line but assuming everything goes as planned, we’re headed to China in about a month and a half.  WOW-ZA.

To say that we’re feeling the crunch… would be a massive understatement.  Jia’s room isn’t ready, all of our funds aren’t in place, we have about a zillion things on our “want to do before Jia comes” list, Eden’s wrapping up the school year so I want to do all the end of school things, my job is in flux and it’s been a recipe for wanting to hide under the covers and come out in July when we’re ready to get on a plane.  There has been some stress eating and some crying and some desperate emails to friends (thank you Anna!).  It is nice to paint a rosy picture of the adoption process, but honestly friends, sometimes it feels overwhelming in a way I have never been overwhelmed before.  You would not waste your prayers on us as we move into this final chapter, and we could certainly use them.

But, on a happier note, as part of LOA, we also received an update on our littlest girl!  We learned that her favorite color is purple, she loves sea weed snacks (we’ve tried them ourselves and I think we’ll save them for her!), she is putting together two-three word sentences, and we also got some updated pictures, a few I’ve included here.  We are so excited to see all these things in person!

We also finally decided on her official name, which will be Jiaqi Madilyn Pollard.  You pronounce Jiaqi, GE-AH-CHEE, which is kind of like hibachi if that helps.  We will still call her Jia though.

A few things you could be specifically praying for or sending us good vibes on:

1. Jia’s transition from her foster family to us will be really hard. There is no way through but through and we are already grieving that for her. Please pray for her attachment to us and for her grief as she misses the only family she knows right now.
2. Eden is really excited to be a big sister, but it is really sinking in that having a sibling means sharing your parents, and we’re starting to see some hard stuff from that. This will be a transition for everyone and that’s totally normal and good, even, but please just pray for her tender heart and for our girls to develop a sister bond that will last.
3. And finally, as we walk through transitioning two girls through some HUGE changes and adjustments, Josh and I would so appreciate your prayers for patience, our positive attitudes and that we would know how to handle things the right way. We really make an effort to be a united Team Pollard and stress sometimes makes that a little more challenging, so we’d certainly appreciate any extra support.

So, that’s the latest!  As always, thank you for your support and love for us.  I wish I could do a better job of telling you just how much your support means to us, but please know that we are humbled constantly by your kindness.